Stop Second-Guessing Yourself: Part Two
“Safety is not the absence of threat; it is the presence of connection.” - Dr. Gabor Maté
The scene is set. The characters are at their appointed positions, and the script is finally ready after countless revisions.
Lights. Camera. Action!
And so, the story in your head kicks in for another encore performance. Except you don’t remember any standing ovation or fierce round of applause after the last time the story played.
Ever feel like you can’t stop going over something in your head? Like, enough already?
Those stories that cause you to question yourself are the hardest to bear. This one again, really?
WHY, pray tell, does your mind insist on pulling that book off the shelf and reading it to you again?
I’ll tell you why:
Because RULE #1 is always SAFETY FIRST.
That’s right. Your brain is trying to make sense of that thing, whatever IT is. And spinning some judgy story about it is a strategy your mind uses to try to make the threat disappear.
Except you end up feeling WORSE.
So how do you stop second-guessing yourself?
In a word, CONNECTION.
Canadian physician Dr. Gabor Maté tells us that “safety is not the absence of threat; it is the presence of connection.”
What does that mean for you?
It means you finally get a break when you show up for this beleaguered and exhausted part of yourself with radical kindness.
Self-compassion provides inner reliability. You start to trust that no matter how difficult the situation, you’ll be there in a supportive way for yourself.
So the next time the curtain opens and the scene rolls out for the eighty-seventh time, you can pause. Breathe. Talk to the part of you who feels scared. Your calming reassurance meets you exactly where you’re at.
And THAT’s a one-act show you’d gladly watch again!
Want a free guide to help you flip your second-guessing script? Here it is!